Is
there a point where it is okay for the other half to possess all
passwords with unrestricted access to our electronic life? At first
glance, some may say a married couple share everything and that includes
passwords…and yes, your phone too. After all if you have nothing to
hide, then you have nothing to fear. Another group would cite the right
to individual privacy – arguing that our electronic life is more than
just our actions, but also to a degree, our fantasies, which can be
likened to a virtual mapping of our mind. If you may indulge me and
contemplate the year 3000 where communication is now transmitted
directly from one mind to the other. With this technology, technically
speaking we would be able to share each other’s mind. Will you be okay
sharing your mind with your spouse? After all, if you have nothing to
hide, then you have nothing to fear, right?
The
line between relationship and individual territory can be thin and
blurry with different people willing to compromise varied degrees of
their individuality for companionship. At what point is it okay for a
partner to touch the other’s phone? I’m not even talking about touching
it to have a sniff around, I mean just to even play Candy Crush. A week?
A month? Six months? A year? After marriage? When they die? In heaven?
Never? No one can really say.
But
before we get lost in regulating privacy, we need to have a discussion
of why we even need it in the first place. Thanks to bad parenting,
media influence, societal and cultural values, and a million and two
other factors I cannot be bothered to name, the modern day human mind
has never been closer to the brink of insanity trying to create the
illusion of our ideal image to be perceived as our actual image. This of
course is often far from our realistic image. Just think of Bill
Clinton getting that blow job and how the world was up in arms like he
was the first man to get head in an office. If the same story leaked
about Donald Trump, we wouldn’t have perceived it in the same light
because the image Mr Trump parades has much room for such behavior. The
same cannot be said about Bill Clinton.
In
other words, privacy is just our right to the secret which we use to
portray ourselves, as we would like the world to see us. Statistically
speaking 47% of the population with body parts fetishes have a foot
fetish, but people would sooner go to jail than tell you they like to
suck toes. As my friend put it, everyone will tell you they watch porn, but no one will let you go through their browsing history.
Perhaps
our right to privacy is a social contract we have all agreed to because
we aren’t easily capable of unconditional acceptance of each other. The
fact that we would be worried about our other half constantly being
able to read our minds is evidence that we do need to keep things from
each other, even if only thoughts. Until we master the all accepting
love often attributed to the God of our universe, the need for a degree
of privacy will not go away.
I cannot
tell you where the line starts or stops with privacy. To be honest, it
is something I am still pondering myself. But it is important to know
that as much as we shouldn’t let paranoia drive us to distrust, we also
shouldn’t take advantage of our partner’s respect for our space to run
wild.
P.S Do you have an online or
phone privacy story to share? Or perhaps some words of wisdom regarding
privacy? Please don’t be scared of the comment section
Photo Credit: Dreamstime | Wavebreakmedia Ltd
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